Monday, December 31, 2007

Things that should never happen to u during the last week of december......
1.Write back to-back to -back exams, that too one in the morning and the other one in the afternoon...

2. Sit at home and blog abt nonsensical things when ur family in partying in goa.

3. Just stare at the bottles of old monk, 6 flavours of smirnoff, the coconut Fenny , 2 bottles VAT 69 and the goan wine that ur father brings back from goa and not show any signs of interest on ur face...

4. Try to be happy after getting ONE MORE, ONE MORE..!! SOOOOO come-ya go-ya ish goa t-shirt with all those dolphins and coconut tress that fade away after the first wash.

5. Get constipated after eating half a KG of goan cashew...

6. And finally try to digest HYDRAULICS AND PNEUMATICS on the new years eve when the rest of the world is drowning in all kinds of fluids........

Monday, December 24, 2007

To B or not to B B-schooled...??
Yesterday night i get this forward....
ECONOMICS TEACHER-"give me an example of a complete business failure due to negligence.."

U most final year engineering students are BIG B-school aspirants..... me also being officially in the final year...thought of aspiring to get into a B-school.So, i thought about the joke in a very B-SCHOOL ASPIRANTISH way.(its a different story altogether that i did not take up the CAT...and ironically my mother teaches MBA bere vishya bidi..)
Now say, the teacher asks santa for an explanation.....In the typical B-school way(not the blazer wearing, laptop carrying, come YA go YA way).As i cant put up a power point presentation on a blog u c, so...

*What is the CORE COMPETENCY of this Business...??
-Utility theory explains consumer tastes and preferences. Consumers purchase those things that give them satisfaction or utility. As a consumer consumes more of any one product, other goods and services look more desirable. As one consumes more of a product, smaller and smaller increments of pleasure or satisfaction come from it. The law of diminishing marginal utility underlies the law of demand.

*How do u define this BUSINESS..??
This business is a Joint float-An arrangement by which a group of currencies(people) maintain a fixed relationship relative to each other, but move jointly relative to another currency(people) in response to supply and demand conditions in the market.

*What are the Worst Case Scenarios present..??
dirty float-A type of floating exchange rate that is not completely freely floating because central banks(read pimps and madams) intervene from time to time to alter the rate from its free-market level. It is still a floating rate because it has not been pegged at a predetermined par value.

*What is the Driving force in this business..??
To monetize-To convert assets into money

*What is the greatest threat and what may be its outcome..???
Multilateralism-An international policy intended to free international trade from the restrictions of bilateralism. Multilateralism represents an effort to permit nations(people) to specialize in production and exchange in accordance with the principle of comparative advantage.
*Multulateralism leads to-
*moral hazard-The risk that a party to a transaction has not entered into a contract in good faith, has provided misleading information about its(her) assets, liabilities, or capacity, or has an incentive to take unusual risks in a desperate attempt to earn a profit before the contract settles.

What are the outcomes of the business failure...??
A pregnant prostitute goes thru INFLATION-both physically and physiologicaly.So, as in all businesses, she has her CYCLE of inflation and deflation
frictional unemployment-Short-term joblessness associated with mobility.(Literally...!!)

*What can be done to find out the DEFAULTER...??
Check credit history (A record of how a person has borrowed and repaid debt.)

*What happens to the business..??
Recession-A significant decline in general economic activity extending over a period of time.

*How do u overcome these failures and what are the options during the failure period..??
Learn from mistakes.Always sing relevant songs(yeh kya huan....kab hua..kyun hua..?? remember the ad..?)
Options during failure period- BLOW away your problems and TURN AROUND your failures into success...!!

P.S. dear "readers", please tell will i be a good b-schooler...??
P.S.2 to whom so ever it may concern...thumbaaaa thanks for the message...i know u will read this post someday and go pink and will never ever send me anymore forwards...!!
P.S.3 For the curious, all the above mentioned terms are got from here. Please do not think that i knew all these terms before...!!

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Y VIVA...!??
It was the last lab exam of my engineered engineering(hopefully... i think i will get thru). Had mugged up the formulas, the tabular coloumns and all the other shit. Exam was at 10 in the morning....i go to college at 9, people are furiously revising, re-revising, re-re-revising. I go to a relatively so called "AVERAGE" guy and ask him "oodidya?" (have u studied?). He says "ok ok, parvaagilla ".I ask him for his record book as i hardly have written anything in mine. I glance thru it, and suddenly I find 4 formulas which i never knew existed. Somehow i manage to mug those formulas as well. Its time.. I pray that i somehow get a very easy experiment and i pass.
The exam starts at 10.30, I get 2 decent experiments. I try and complete them. Its finally time for my VIVA (a sort of a ORAL test sort of a shit). I go and sit in front of the external examiner with my most innocent and childish posture.And, it starts most humiliating VIVA ever..

Extern-yenappa nin hesaru? (whats ur name?)
me-nikhil sir
Me-Mysooru only sir..
Extern-hmm....appa yen kelsa madthare? (where does ur father work?)
me- HR in some factory sir..
Extern- Nodidya avara factory? (have u seen his factory?)
me- yes sir.

Extern-hmm....logarithmic decrement andre yenu..?? (what is logrithmic decrement?)
me-hmm...hmm....(smile).. donn..gothilla sir..
Extern- adara graph bari nodona... ( write its graph)
me- hmm....(draw 2 lines....stop..) sir logarithmic decrement means the logarithmic ratio of 2 successive amplitudes sir..
Extern- (nodding his head) write the graph..
me- donno sir...(again smile)
Extern-Vibrations passa..???
Me-(shaking shaking head) hun sir passss....

Extern-appa gaadi tekotidaraa..? (father got u a vehicle??)
me-yes sir
Extern-yaavdu? (which?)
Extern- (cynically smiling) dina adralli joooom antha barthya..?? (everyday coming fast on that)
me-yeno barthini sir. ( i somehow come sir)
Extern- mane yelli...yesht doora illinda? (where is ur house and how far is it from here??)
me- in vijaynagar sir, arnd 20-21 kms to and fro..
Extern- ashtdoordinda bandu yen maadthay college alli..? (coming from so far what u do in coll?)
me-(looking at my answer sheet) hmm...hmmmm.. (smile smile)
Extern-placement aaitha..
me-illa sir
Extern-hmmm..... ninna experiment alli a fringe formation ge yeen anthare....??
me-fringes are formed due to stresses acting because of the load sir.
Extern- I know that.... what are the formations called.
Me- Fringes sir.
Extern- oodidya...?? (studied??)
Me- illa sir.' (no sir)
Extern-yenu maadla..?? (u donno anything...shall i fail u??)
me-(smile smile smile)

Extern-nimma appanige hela neenu yenu oodolla bari beedi sutthya anthya...?? (shall i tell ur father that u dont study and only loaf around?)
Me-(smile smile) beda sir. (no sir)
Extern-what are the different types of governors...??
Me- gothilla sir. (donno sir)
Extern-y are governors used.?
Me-for speed control sir.
Extern-how they control speed..??
Me-donno sir..
Extern-ninage yeenu gothilla.....thats y u still not placed...sari now hoogu...
Me-thanku sir...

*runs away before the internal examiner asks anything*
*the attender asks for my a fool i give it to him....later i realize that MY record will be used as a reference for the juniors...god save them....*

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Its almost the end of the year and its chali chali in namma mysooru.... Here are some pics I took.
Camera-Fathers Grey Market Sony Ericson k350-I mobile phone VGA camera
Locale- Namma mane garden.
Pics By- Yours truly of course...!!

Colour colour kempu colour ............. and .......................... 2 hibiscus

Nee mudida mallige hoovina maale......... and.......... Nee mudida mallige hoovina maale..2



Friday, December 14, 2007

You don't have to be American to appreciate this.....!!
This is one book which every1 should to read to realise what upbringing gives us, what our culture teaches us, and what we teach others. I got a original paper back edition for 80rs on the roadside...!! Any1 wants it I will be glad to lend it to him/her, provided, I get it back safely...!!

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

It had been more than a week....I had blatantly ignored her, had not even gone near her. She was standing there as always, gentle yet commanding, slim yet powerful. She was standing there.... I went near her, she was not disturbed by my presence, I rather felt that she was expecting me. I stood there looking at her for a minute, soaking in the feeling of being beside her..... then... I touched her.... I almost shivered.... it was too much for me.... 1 week was too long a time for any man....let alone me..... in the blink of an eye I was on top of her..... She was a little nervous in the beginning, a little unwilling to react... slowly she was coming to life.... I was coming to life as well.....this was it.... 1 week was too long......SHIT.... I had forgotten my protection...!!! I rushed back...put it on and was on top her of again... this time she was alive and kicking....we rode along comparatively slowly after the start... then we rode on faster...and faster.... I felt her shuddering under my legs.... I had reached the limit...I had to let go..... this was it..... this was it.....

I let go of the accelerator and slowly me and my bike decelerated.....
Thats the pleasure of riding a 2 stroke 4 speed RX135...
An RX-er for LIFE.......
And WHAT WERE YOU SICKOS THINKING...!!!!???????? I may have turned 21 yesterday, but that does'nt mean I misuse my fundamental rights.....!!!!!

P.S. The pic is of some other bike also is the same colour and only needs a paint job and a change of clutch plates....can some1 sponsor them to me...!??

P.S.2. For ppl who wished me on my birthday, thank u...!! for ppl who did not wish me...THUMBA THANKS....!!!!

P.S.3 I will be very happy to take any1 on a ride on my RX...(will be happier if it is a person of the opposite sex..!! :D )

Friday, December 07, 2007

It revealed more than what it hid.....
Just another ride after dropping off my mother to the bus stand. Its 12.45 and unusually hot for a december afternoon. Waiting for the signal to turn green, I see a woman clad in a burka and a hijab walk past me. Fortunately for me or unfortunately for her, the hijab and the burka failed to serve their purpose. The strands of hair fluttered in the dusty wind, her copper coloured hand straightened it out, she adjusted her burka a little, and walked past me,the sway of her hips revealed her feminity which no tube top or low strung jeans could have matched. The light changed from red to green, I was still standing where i was, a shrill horn made me accelerate, I was just in time to catch up with her, I was about to turn and catch a glimpse of her face, and then i realized, why spoil the romance...!???
Did I see her hips sway because i am me, or did she just walk that way...?? Did I see what she wanted me to see, or did I see what I wanted to see...??

I waited for the light to turn another signal, on another day....

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

PRO-JEKT (for some reason i like 'K' more than 'C' )-2
Off late as I'm trying to be very bollywoodish, and in trying to keep the tradition alive, here is a sequel or a "part 2" as some might like to call it of my "overtly hyped post".
Little did I know the importance of a projekt and the seriousness of it is settling in now. And i'm still the dumbest of the dumbest in the group, the last one to know about the "new" projekt, and, hate the projekt co-guide because of his wonderfully shaped pot belly. And what are we supposes to do..?? A SOLAR COOKER........sounds exciting for a guy who knows only how to cook maggi.......

The Thinker.
Still obsessed with pink floyd, gurucharan das and led zeplin, this guy gets a brain wave after listening to "crazy diamond" and comes up with the idea of doing something using solar energy.... agreed his name means something very integral in the water cycle, but DUDE......the subject ain't even ur elective...!!!! Who gave u the idea of COOKING UP something using sunlight. No wonder ur favorite sign off thing is SHINE ON....
SHINE ON U CRAZY *&^#*$#*^*^@((*^#

The Talker.
3 more strands of hair on a almost bald man's head does things to him, it really does. The solar cooker is sooooooooooo very interesting to this guy thanks to his immense appetite and immenser interest in food. He still is the second brainiest guy in the group and thanks to him the canteen is in business still even in the holidays.

The Smoker.
The light at the end of his cigarette has ignited his mind (APJ.AK be blessed) literally has. He suddenly seems to know more about the projekt than any1 of us and the guy cleared one subject in revals which makes my count 1 less. And for the record, he has stopped selling spice sim cards as he is quite a rich man now........

The FUC***
He still is like the most un-interested,un-involved person in the group. He still gives ideas and advice to other people on their projekts. He still hasn't got a job and is hopelessly jobless.He is again broke and has exactly 90rs in his purse this time. He has a shave every day now for absolutely no reason. He is still the same FUC*** up guy even after he has got a projekt and is slightly interested in it. And he still still still doesn't get more than 10 comments by different people in his blog...!!!

P.S. These are the ramblings of a demented mind and the protagoinsits/readers are told not to view the comments made by this demented mind seriously.....after all the mind is still a 6yr olds....!!

Sunday, December 02, 2007

"Just like the butterfly, I too will awaken in my own time....."
P.S.i am waiting too...!!